I normally use this space to explain the genesis of the story above, but this time I’m going to leave it a mystery, beyond saying that it was inspired by a conversation I had at a writing weekend in 2007 and written during that same weekend. It’s since become somewhat notorious among those who’ve read it: amusingly, male readers have tended to describe it as a thinly-veiled allegory, female ones as a romantic fantasy. Vive la différence.

This became the first of my stories to be performed for an audience – by a Real Live Actor, no less – at the Liars’ League event last Tuesday. (Theme: “His and Hers”. I had no choice, really.) Like many brilliant ideas, Liars’ League is based on a very simple insight: in this case, that authors are often the worst possible people to read their own work. Getting actors to perform them instead is an inspired move.

My story was read by Martin Lamb, who did a splendid job of bringing this story to life, wringing every possible laugh out of the material. My objectivity is obviously questionable, but it did seem to go down well with the audience, who’d been nicely primed (and, I daresay, well lubricated) by the time The Man With The Musical Penis made its debut. Thanks to the Liars, to Martin and to the listeners for a great night!